I was ungrateful

Sometimes it takes the desert to hear yourself again

When I stepped off the plane in the scorching Cairo heat, the heavily polluted air wrapped around me tightly.

I had only slept three hours the night before and felt completely unprepared for the sensory overload: the smells, sounds, and visual chaos of this 22-million-strong city. It wasn’t my first time in the Middle East yet Egypt felt different.

We dropped off our bags at a hotel that felt like a modern fortress, with multiple security checkpoints to pass through. From our 11th-floor room, I could see the Nile sparkling below us and the pyramids, in the far distance, peeking through hotel and home towers in the early evening light. What a gorgeous view!

Can you spot the pyramids on the left of the large hotel tower?

As I put my head down on those soft white pillows to rest for just a few minutes before we headed out to explore, I realised something:

Community

I came here for a series of wedding celebrations. Not just a wedding, but a whole collection of pre-and post-wedding gatherings that honoured the couple’s mixed cultures. And while I wasn’t hugely excited about this trip with all its demanding preparations initially, I quickly realized how ridiculous I had been. I got to travel to Egypt and see the pyramids, a favourite bucket list destination for so many.

Here I was, tired, hungry and slightly ungrateful.

To be honest, I would have rather spent my holiday budget in my favourite country on earth, Italy. However, all I needed was that nap on comfy Egyptian pillows to finally come to my senses and remember the beauty in the collective celebration of love over multiple days and in these different locations. Also, the food is insanely flavourful, the nature beautiful and the history is absolutely fascinating.

People from all over the world came together and being part of such a tight-knit, generous community was a reminder that we too often take human connection for granted. At least I did.

Poverty + Privilege

I am lucky to have been born in Germany, and while I don’t claim to have all the answers, I know the choices I make do matter. This wedding trip to Egypt highlighted for me how deeply intertwined poverty and privilege sadly are.

As I walked through Cairo's streets, I saw the stark contrast between my own comfort of staying in a soft, clean hotel bed and the hardship faced by so many locals just steps away. I kept thinking about the broader impact of my daily choices, the work I do, what I buy, and how I engage with the world.

I believe that our decisions, when multiplied, can create change in ways far more significant than one-off acts of kindness that make us feel good and help in the moment. I suppose that is why, for years, I have been saying “One day I’ll found my own NGO”. It’s a bit more complex to set up but slowly taking shape…

Problems

In many ways, having problems beyond food and shelter is a luxury. To be able to worry about politicians with yellow faces and weird hair, cry about noisy neighbours, or complain over a bad dish at your Saturday dinner date.

No matter how discombobulated I felt at first, this trip once again put my everyday 'worries' into perspective. Seriously, I have so many choices why do I let myself feel stuck so often? It reminded me that the things we (the ones who have time to write and read stuff online) often stress over are tiny compared to the larger struggles faced by the majority of people on this planet.

Celebrating Culture

In a world that seems to be developing backwards in many ways, where nationalism and isolationism are on the rise again, I found myself thinking about the power of celebration. Embracing our diverse group of friends and family.

Celebrating mixed-culture love, in all its complexities, flavours and colours, is one of the strongest acts of rebellion we have against those who would prefer division over unity.

It is the biggest fuck you to systems, political voices and theories of wannabe somebodies who aim to dictate who belongs and who doesn’t.

Wedding traditions (click on image to read full text)

That’s all from me today. Short reflections from the desert heart.

See you soon, Carmen

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